Inhale. Exhale. Repeat.

So often in life, I find myself with stressors (some that exist only in my mind) piling on my shoulders. 

Work. Chores. Relationships. 

Inadequacies. Jealousies. 

Deadlines. Life goals.

These things pile up so high that I feel like I'll be crushed under their weight. My body reacts physically, as if those things in my heart and in my head are real, tangible weights that have been strapped to me. My trapezius muscles get so tight it feels like they might snap. My shoulders curl in toward the front of my body. I grind my teeth and furrow my brow until my head throbs. I'm so tense all over that my bones seem to ache.

When I'm on my yoga mat, I can let go of all that tension, at least for the hour or so that my mat is my home. It's taken about nine months for me to get to the place where my mat is somewhere I run to feel better, but now that it is that place, I want to be there as often as I can.

Last week, my yoga instructor, Stephanie, taught us a mantra that one of her instructors had taught her. 

"Inhale. Exhale. Repeat." 

No matter what's going on in your head, no matter what's going on in your heart, you can inhale, exhale, and repeat. 

Our breath keeps us alive. In yoga, we practice pranayama, which means "extension of the breath," or "extension of the life force." We begin most classes with different deep breathing exercises that fill our lungs up and empty them completely. It's amazing how different I feel after this part of class. My whole body feels lighter, and those burdens from before melt away a little at a time until I'm fully present on my mat. I use my time on my mat to stretch myself physically, but also to stretch myself psychologically. I take control of my thoughts and my feelings for that hour and rest in stillness, even when I'm moving through different poses/asanas...or falling down.

But then, at the end of class, I have to say Namaste, stand up, roll up my mat, and head back out into the world. At this point, it's often hard for me to maintain that feeling of lightness. I walk into the cold, get in my car, do whatever errands need to be done, and after just a little while, my neck and shoulders are tight rubber bands again. To calm down, I can't really sink into a king pigeon (eka pada rajakapotasana) in the middle of the super market, or rest in down dog (adho mukha svanasana), but I can control how I breathe. I can practice my ujjayi pranayama (ocean breath) and let that soothe my nerves, or I can focus on having equal ratio breaths (sama vritti) to take my mind off of the commotion around me. I can inhale, exhale, and repeat until my tension melts into nothing.

This is my new goal: not to let life overwhelm me. So far, when I've been stressed, or life has gotten rocky, my momma has always been there to tell me, "This too shall pass, little one." I always knew she was right, but never knew how to control my emotional state long enough to allow the thing that was weighing on me to go away. Now I have a way to help me allow these trials, obstacles, and weights, to pass. I'll inhale and I'll exhale, over and over and over. 

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Side note: My eka pada rajakapotasana progress!